beautiful things get tainted. in this life, that is one of the constant things that circulate daily. and when you realize that that beautiful thing is a thing that you hold precious in your heart, it will be painful. painful, ugly, and alot more. we can't save anything from destroying itself, when this life is full of despair and anger and consuming negative vibes. sometimes we can't even save ourselves. but somehow, in some way, deep inside our hopeless hearts and minds, we think that we're okay as long as this beautiful thing doesn't get consumed by the ugliness this world breathes of. but what if it does?

what if this beautiful thing gets tainted?

oh, it will destroy you. when the silence between you becomes too deafening. when uncertainties and doubts engulf you entirely. it will be the death of you. when you can't face each other anymore, because the words you want to hear remain unsaid, and this thing gets left in the air without a tag to say if it's going to be saved or not.

this once beautiful thing now becomes something that slowly and venomously pulls you down to oblivion. it's like drowning in a sea of cold, cold confusion and you don't know whether you'll flap your arms and legs to save yourself or just let yourself fall.

little somethings, little misunderstandings, arguments. tiny words unsaid, stares and glances unseen. secret sniffling of your hair, your skin, your clothes. the things you don't know, the things you don't say, it can destroy it. and when you realize that, when that suddenly hits you, it will be straight to the heart. and it will be unbearable.

and when you let yourself drown, when you know that this beautiful thing has gone deep beneath the cold, dark sea, how would you know if it can be saved? well, can it? when you know that both sides are either blind or scared or simply oblivious.

and then you think, does he know you well enough to save you? when you're already out of breath, floating and dying. when will he realize that it's time to save this? will he know what to say or do?

or will this thing and you remain drowning in cold, painful oblivion?

or die of drowning when it's too late to be saved?